"Everything isn't timing, Everyone is always evolving"

I've just spent the entire day with my Mom,my grandmother and my stepdad's family it was great!! I love my mother!! However that has nothing to do with this blog entry,just wanted to say so if(when) my mother reads this she will know that I loved every moment of the craziness because I got to share it with her.

Now on with the blog entry. Someone made a comment on one of my blogs that everything is timing and he is correct. Now he is also someone I used to date that didn't go the way I would have wanted things to go but its alright everything happens for a reason and in its right time,right? Or could it have just been that my time with him was up? Listen I get everything is timing and faith but this comment came from the same guy that said if you want something you have to make it happen.So you understand my confusion when he says everything is timing.I'd like to make it clear that I'm not upset that he commented on my blog,because I asked him to, and I'm really glad that he is a cool enough guy to do so upon request. As I pondered his comment I started to think about timing, in relationships and how the contexts of "timing" differs between male and females.

When guys say "Timing" they are basically saying they aren't ready for a relationship or they just aren't ready for a relationship with you. Now I'm not a man,but from what I get from my chocolate and non-chocolate male friends that's what it means. I've known guys that have told women the "timing" just wasn't right and a week later they fall head over heels for some girl, and a year later they are married to the girl they met right after "the not the right timing" girl. I mean lets just keep it 100 you didn't like her that much or enough to want to be ready.

Now for women timing is the same but regarded different. We look at timing and think, I'm not totally happy with myself or I just don't know if I can commit at the moment,or we think he just isn't the right one for me so why waste my time on him. This is where men and women's maturity levels differ,women are able to vocalise they aren't ready men just aren't!!!

As I'm writing this blog,I'm thinking about timing,and how it really does have a lot to do with everything,both spiritually and physically.It brings me to particular guy I met,whom was an amazing chocolate brother,intelligent,social and just a good brother all around. We met on the muni the year I graduated from college. We didn't exchange numbers because I of course being the semi-sadiddy nubian that I am,I wasn't going to give my number to someone on the bus(I was on the bus as well,so really what made me think I was any better them him,God only knows). However I told him my name and that I was on facebook,so the next day I had a facebook friend request from this chocolate man,a week or so later we exchanged numbers and we ended up meeting up probably a month or two later,it turned out he lived down the street from me. We met up at this coffee shop,he had in his hand a small cup of hazelnut hot chocolate and a bag of stale doughnut holes!!! We walked and talked but for the life of me I just could not get into the brother and I think he understood that,so that night was the last time I saw him or really spoke to him for awhile. I'd say three months later we started talking more frequently on facebook and then I moved.

Its now 8months-a year later from when we had first met up with the hot chocolate and stale doughnuts, we met again in Oakland. This time our meeting was the complete opposite, I was fascinated by everything he was saying the conversation was electric and I was like a sponge just soaking up everything he had to say and I definitely wanted to see him again.

Why was it so different? Well the fine chocolate brother that was once mine,that commented on my blog post was correct in saying everything is timing.However I feel like timing sounds so calculating and cold, we aren't science projects in a dish being timed,to see when we will change, we are human with spirits and minds. I was a different person when I first met hot chocolate and stale doughnut chocolate brother,I had different ideas,my heart was in a different place. My mind was transitioning into where it is now, my soul was in the process of soaring high to the heavenly skies,there was no way that I could see pass what was happening to me,to focus on someone else.

People evolve and thats what makes us beautifully human,you can like something and love it later,love something and like it later, it all depends on how are you evolving. So "Everything isn't timing, Everyone is always evolving"!

Thanks Dears and do come again!!
"That black girl"